Fyfes 1-2 Maccabi AA5 - March 18 2007

By Eddy Blaxell

A header from a second-half corner gave Maccabi AA5's a deserved 2-1 victory over Team Fyfe at an unusually green Mackay 4.

From the time team organiser Mental arrived on his yellow bicycle and completed three laps of Mackay without finding a teammate, it was obvious this was not going to be a day on which organisation came to the fore.

Eventually Mental met up with Ozzieshane and Gordon, and there was a pleasant surprise in store: the new Lokomotiv Cove strips had arrived! After much deliberating over the location of the match, and with girls' matches in progress on all fields (much to Shane's enjoyment), the members of the almighty Fyfes stumbled accross a fellow bunch of vagrants purporting to be the opposition. There was a remarkable symmetry to the two groups: while the Team Fyfe organisers sat around waiting for a team, the Maccabi AA5 team sat around waiting for their organiser, the mysterious "Milner".

Around 20 minutes before the planned kick-off, and with Jacko, Dan and "Get a life Mental" having arrived, representatives of the two sides agreed upon two 40 minute halves, starting at 3:15.

By 3pm most members of the Fyfes were present, and it was time to get the boots on and start preparing for the match ahead.

While in a better mental state than the previous week, Ozzieshane ruled himself out with a toe injury, allowing him to slot into the managerial role vacated by Morgan, who was enjoying an undeserved week's rest. The absence will have done nothing to quell rumours surrounding Morgan, who was reported to be close to quitting following suggestions he had lost respect of the dressing room with his touchline antics and notorious "squiggles formation".

Rory made a shock comeback from a university assignment which had looked set to keep him out of the match, allowing him to start in Shane's new 4-4-2 formation.

In front of Jacko, the backline was aiming to improve on last week's horrific effort at Meadowbank, where they conceded three goals (or perhaps five, who knows) in 70 minutes. Shane chose Lewis to partner Hibbert at the heart of defence, with Mental and Luke (who shook off any doubt surrounding his availability when he arrived two minutes before kick off) guarding the flanks, and Rory sitting in front of the back four.

Curran slotted in ahead of Rory in the centre of midfield, Dan and Gordo occupied the wide midfield berths and the ever-threatening Jasper and Chen started up front.

From the outset it looked to be a difficult challenge for Ozzieshane, as he was chosen to referee.

The less said about the first half-hour the better, as Maccabi camped in the Lokomitiv half and a goal to the team in dark blue looked inevitable. Only some desparate defending from Mental and Hibbert, and later D'Arcy who came on at left back and showed never-before seen pace to beat attackers to the ball on no less than two occasions, kept the Fyfes in the contest. Up against the challenge of number 8, 11 and 14, the big Maccabi strikers, the Fyfes always had to be on their toes. The constant switching of sides between the strikers caused problems for Lewis, the defensive marshall who had never before had to cope with such sophisticated attacking patterns. But for the most part the Fyfes held firm, if not through marking then through desparate scrambling, and only one weak header forced a simple save from Jacko.

Just minutes before half time, disaster finally struck. For Maccabi. A long ball out of defence was played over the head of Curran, who had managed to find himself free on the halfway line. As the lanky striker turned and chased, the call of "hammertime" rang out from the Fyfe half - the predetermined code for "the keeper's off his line, chip him!" Curran headed the ball down into his stride and with his second touch lobbed the keeper from the corner of the box, wheeled away and kissed the badge on his brand new shirt. There was a sense of deja vu for the Fyfes, Curran having scored one chip and hit the post with another in the last two matches. What was new was the feeling of being ahead; hitherto unkown for the mighty Fyfes.

On the stroke of half time an incident occured which, if not for the sportsmanship of the Maccabi team, could have seen the match take an unsavoury turn. As the Fyfes went to sleep following their goal, Maccabi attacked down the left, with number 8 taking on Mental down the touchline. Sensing the danger from the three Maccabi forwards waiting on the middle, Mental took out the number 8 with what could best be described as a cynical hack. The referee (who replaced shane 10 minutes in before leaving at half time) took no liking to the tackle, informing Mental that had he remembered his cards, he'd have produced one in a flash. Luckily for the game, the incident was soon forgotten as both sides wandered off for half-time festivities.

The second half began in much the same vein as much of the first, Maccabi dominating possession and position but unable to find the equaliser. A number of shots went wide before number 11 went charging down the right and looked to swing a cross in toward his waiting forwards. From the tight angle the best he could manage was a vicous "cross-cum-shot" that beat the unsuspecting Jacko at the near post for 1-1.

Minutes later number 8 attacked down the left, but was well shadowed by Rory and Lewis and ended up losing possession. However as Mental took control of the ball and looked to release Chen on the counter, the whistle blew; number 8 had been fouled. As Mental made his way back to the top of the 6-yard box the free kick was swung in, and a header beat Jacko at the far post: the dirty dark blues were in the lead. It was another case of organisation letting down the Fyfes, and an area that really needs to be addressed in the future.

Following this a slanging match ensued between Mental - who wasn't marking - and Lewis - who wasn't sweeping.

In the final 20 minutes the match petered out and all that was really on show was the lack of fitness from the Team Fyfe players. A 5-0-5 formation ensued, with a 60-metre midfield dominated by Maccabi players able to unleash their forwards at will. Only a stunning right-arm block from Jacko halted one attack, while the keeper got down quickly to close out a one-on-one chance after number 14 got around Hibbert on the edge of the box.

The Fyfes did have a good chance to equalise when Mental's poor cross found a defender and rebounded into the path of Burke. The big utility's shot was hard and fast, and swirled dangerously before the keeper got a hand to it; falling back in the process.

The only other chances of note fell to Chen on the edge of the box: one found the sideline and the other the moon. Indeed the highlight of the last quarter was the discovery of an Ed on the other team, bringing the number of Eds on the field to four.

As the whistle blew, it was time to argue over how many goals we conceded the previous week, and who would write the match report. And look forward to the future, when hopefully we can play some teams in the same division as us.